- Southern Border Security: Mexico
- Northern Border Security: Russia
- Department of Energy: Iran
- Environmental Protection Agency: BP
Tuesday, February 28, 2006
Friday, February 24, 2006
This week I was thrust into the face of an old lover, and I found that the love was gone. My old lover was the road. I spent 4-5 nights a week on the road in my previous career and this week I was forced to travel again. It was the first time that I have been away from my family in nearly 5 months. The trip itself was okay. I went to
First, missed flights. Going in I was delayed (ice) and made my connection with seconds to spare. On the way home I decided to catch an earlier flight and got it, but then lost my drivers license and they wouldn't let me board (go figure!). After twenty minutes I found it hiding in a place I never would have thought to look, my wallet. I ran to the gate (2 minutes after boarding was to start) to find that it was delayed (fog from 10 hours previous in the day - makes sense). Now I can relax a little. Oops, forgot that since I was delayed that I would miss the connection, and I did. For some reason originating flights are always delayed but connecting flights have impeccable punctuality records. Good news is that the next flight to Nash Vegas was only about an hour later and I didn't have to wait for my original/original flight which would have brought me home at about . But, that would have been too easy. As I sat in the boarding area they announced that the crew for the flight was delayed on another inbound flight (something about a sandstorm in
Second, bed time. I have been married for nearly 22 years and I am just used to sleeping with my wife. I get to the hotel and there are all these terrific shows on cable (Forensic Files, Cold Case Files, Law & Order, you get the picture) and the next thing I know its like and I know my alarm is about to go off. By the end of the week I am sure that I hadn't a total of 8 hours of sleep. If we ever get satellite at home we will need to have Tivo.
Third, drunks. I happen to work with some of the worst alcoholics that I have ever encountered. These guys live for the consumption of liquor. Now I traveled with some people who like a beer (one who made his own, that’s kind of cool), and one who had a glass of wine with every meal. But these people live for it. On one night we had an evening activity planned. So, the crew went drinking before, and had lots of booze during the meal, and I am pretty sure that they went to the bar in the hotel afterwards (because it is a pattern that I have seen many times). And so, these individuals become known not for what they do for the company but by their reputation as drunks. Even other drinkers mock them behind their backs.
I have never been so anxious to come off the road. It was a long (left on Sunday) and I am weary today. Next week I have a couple of days in
Saturday, February 18, 2006
- Biathlon: Who came up with this one? "Let's go skiing for a half a mile and then shoot at little targets 50 yards away, then ski some more." One of the things that I love is that in the spirit of international good will we let a bunch of men play with loaded guns.
- Curling: Now I know that a lot of people love to make fun of this sport, but if I lived where it were cold I would really be into this one. It has a lot of the feel of shuffleboard, except the pucks are these huge stones. I watched a little of the women's curling yesterday and while the USA absolutely stinks, it still looked a lot of fun.
- Luge/Skelton: Totally insane! I would do this in a heart beat if I could. Here is how this one works. Put on some tights that reveal every bulge in your body, slap on a helmet and lay on a tiny sled just big enough to hold almost all of you (your legs dont' make it). Now you shoot down an iced tube with lots of turns. Luge you lay on your back, Skelton is face down.
- Ski Jumping: There is nothing that you could threaten me with to make me do this. These guys seem to hang in the air for minutes as they sail miles and miles down a mountain side.
Now to make things a little more interesting I would combine some of the sports. For instance, in hockey when some one goes for the shot some of the biathlon members could try to shoot the puck with their rifles. Here are some more ideas:
- Hockey: Make them all wear the skin tights that the guys in the luge wear. Forget those sissy helmets too.
- Speed Skating: Allow the participants to check each other into the wall like in hockey.
- Luge: Forget the sled.
Now for some new sports to help bring some new excitement to the games:
- Downhill skating: Use the bobsled course but the skaters have to stay on their feet.
- Team Biathalon: While one guy is shooting another team member can throw snow balls at the other shooters. To make things fair the skiers travel together so that if one guy is first in he probably won't have to worry about being a target.
- Ice Golf: This is played with a puck and hockey stick, but played on a frozen lake. Each player takes a shot at a whole in the ice, hundreds of yards from the tee. But, unlike golf, a shot might smack another guys puck out of the way. There are only two holes, changing back and forth.
- Ancient Biathlon: Instead of a precision rifles the skiers use a bow and arrow, and it is played at night. So, the participants have to use flaming arrows.
- Snow Fort War: This is not new, it is actually one of the earliest and most practiced of all the winter arts. Two teams build a fort and then lobe snow balls at each other. If there is a tie then the paintball guns come out. If there is still a tie they bring in the biathlon teams.
Wednesday, February 15, 2006
Tuesday, February 14, 2006
The Responsibility of the Government: There are few things that I disagree with our government about, at least the current administration. I think that we are making some great strides towards getting the right judges on the bench, and removing some of the idiots that try to make law instead of interpreting it. I think that our position on the war is correct. I don't necessarily agree with the current environmental policy, but I am not out campaigning against it either. I think that Dick Cheney is on the right track in shooting lawyers.
But, one area that I can't help but express my disappointment is in our handling of the whole Hurricane Katrina disaster. It seems to me that after defending our country against enemies, the response to disasters should be right up there on the top of the list. I am not saying that they should be handing money to everyone who was affected, but they certainly should have well thought out plans on how to manage such a crisis. This is what made things go so smoothly in
It just begs the question, why wouldn't Mayor Naygan of
I would love to ask the President what are his specific plans if
Let me give you my two cents worth, a plan that makes as much sense as anything else that I have read. The
Friday, February 10, 2006
To me a watch needs one basic feature - keep time. Other than that everything else is icing on the cake. My last watch had a stop watch function that I used a few times, an alarm clock that was nice when I traveled, and a couple of other features. When the band broke I was told that it couldn't be replaced and that I had to get a whole new watch. Hey, $40 is a lot when you are struggling with a new business. So I have been without a watch for about 6 months.
I have looked at the Rolex, as well as a couple of dozen really popular status watches. Then the other day I was with a manager and noticed his Rolex. The thought kept going through my mind that the Rolex is the most copied watch on the blackmarket. Whole web sites have been setup to sell these really good fakes. In fact, some of the fakes are going for over $400. Seems like a lot for a fake, but when the original is $16,000 I guess it isn't that bad. But then I look at this guy and wonder if it is real or fake. Then another thought crosses my mind, if it is real I have no respect for a guy who spends that kind of money on a watch. If it is fake it tells me that he is a pretender without any self-esteem.
So yesterday I took the plunge and bought a new watch. It was on sale for $30 at Wal-Mart and suits me just fine, thank you. Since it is only $30 to start with I don't think that there will be a lot of guys out there trying to market an imitation. The label is just swell - "Casio", a high brand by Japanese standards I am sure. It has these three little dials that show me the date, day, and 24 hour time, but my eyes are too old to focus on that stuff anyway. I usually know what day of the week it is and I don't know anyone in the past few years who has actually said "Hey, lets meet up for some coffee at 1630 hours". Even if that happened I am smart enough to do the math and know that its 4:30om.
Now for those of you that have fancy watches -more power to you. I know that Mike has a diver watch just in case the Suburban takes a plunge off the bridge in Tampa and while he is struggling for his life he can know what time it is. If I know Nick he is wearing something with Harley logo on it, of a company watch (sad!). My dad, he is practical, probably something like mine. So don't gang up on me if you are wearing a fancy watch, just know that if its a Rolex more people probably think that its fake than those who think its real.